Sunday, May 16, 2010

Uptown = where it's at.

Last night I left the comfort of the Upper Eastside and headed downtown to a rooftop party in the West Village. It was epic. My bro has a kick-arse rooftop with a sweet view and fun friends. Like me.

The point of this post, however, is to outline why Uptown is superior to Downtown... for those of you who aren't yet convinced. It's far superior. There. Now you know.

When I left the party and looked for a cab, there were none. Zero. My date and I walked all the way East, near Astor Place, before finding a lone cab shining its little light. That is a lie. The cab had people in it and we saw that they were paying and getting out. So we stole the cab before the rightful next passengers noticed. I confess. I stole a cab. But, in my defense, I had been walking for what felt like miles in my Bandolino peep-toe wedges and needed to get back Uptown like [blogfollowers: insert clever analogy here and feel free to comment on it].

Just before finding the only cab in all of downtown NY, we were forced to walk through a makeshift pathway beneath scaffolding (almost every block of NYC has construction). In the pathway were the following:
-a pair of black boots (Aerosoles I think)
-a scent of rank nastiness
-a dead mouse

Also, my date reeeeally wanted to kiss me. Can you blame him? Poor guy. Alas, it was unrequited chemistry.

When I finally made it back to Heaven the Upper Eastside, I saw:
-multiple free taxis shining their lights like stars in the night
-zero dead mice
-ok zero dead or live rodents
-zero men trying to kiss me

I don't know how that last one became an UES plus. Last night it felt like one. Letmetellyou. I was quite happy to have my autonomy back.

Serio. Uptown. What's not to love?

3 comments:

M-Cat said...

And now I know.

The Artisann/Ann-tidote said...

i love your date stories!

kado! said...

ahh...nice to be back home huh!

glad you ventured downtown though...it made for a fun read!