Wednesday, December 29, 2010

The most wonderful time of the year

Yes, these are dark chocolate Ferrero Rondnoir's. Thank you for noticing.

I'm eating my way through the end of 2010. Delish yet dangerous.
Here's to celebrating the holidays with chocolate!
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Friday, December 17, 2010

This just in...

From YBF aka the Young Black and Fabulous (Fabulous and therefore Uptown Girl-worthy)...

It's on, like Rae Dawn Chong. This is a fabulous show that went off-air abruptly. My roommates and I watch re-runs on BET, but we've been dying to know how it all ends. Dying for some new episodes. Dying for some Tasha Mack.

I'm so ready for 2011 now that I know

note to self

This is a good reminder. I need to buy paper towels. And a snow globe.

Friday, December 3, 2010

I am in LOVE. With a shell.

maybe this belongs on Own It? I mean, does Marcel own it or what?

Thursday, November 25, 2010

Gobble Gobble

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

Last Thanksgiving I was on a never-ending flight to Chennai, India to see the world and visit my brother. Feels like yesterday.

This year we're out in New Jersey, chillin with the fam. Those of us who live in the tri-state area are here, most are sleeping. And in a couple hours my older brother will arrive from Virginia with his wife and 4 darling children. This promises to be a day filled with utter chaos, gluttony, love, and proclamations of thanks. I feel thankful to be here, healthy and surrounded by my loved ones.

What are you thankful for?

Monday, November 22, 2010

My Beautiful View

Ooh la la
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Wednesday, November 17, 2010

Viva Mexico!

I had a fantastic trip to Mexico with my Mama and my hermana Liza. We tore up the town in Mexico City, touring around with my aunt and cousins. We literally ate our way around. This is a picture of the most delicioso tortillas being made in a restaurant outside the city. I ate that entire stack. Unabashedly.

This is the same restaurant. Everything was so colorful, and the plantlife was so lush and beautifully groomed throughout the country.

On to Cancun...
I had to document a very yummy Tequila Sunrise in our Cancun resort. What better way to start the day? Ahem...

I miss the beach already. Sand that felt and tasted like cookie dough. Amazing clouds that blocked our sun constantly in a blue sky. Water with multiple shades of blue: from turquoise to purple. Oh the memories are almost enough to get me through my day at work. Almost.

Saturday, November 6, 2010

Sorbet Shop

Just your tipico Mexican ice cream store. So far we are eating our way through Mexico and loving every minuto!
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Tuesday, November 2, 2010

I'll Follow the Sun

I need to pack tonight for my trip to MEXICO!
First Mexico City for a few days and then off to sunny (we hope) Cancun.

I can. not. wait.

I'm anticipating a relaxing week in the sun. With plenty of sunblock of course.
All-inclusive restaurants and swim-up bars. Count me in.

I've been missing the sun for a whole 2 days here in NYC. And what with elections happening, it is officially time to flee the country. Imediamente. En Jueves.
Me encanta el sol!

As for what to pack... please send your tips my way and I'll be sure say hola to the sun for you.

Monday, November 1, 2010

Admirer Run-In #1

Remember my not-so-secret admirer? He tracked me down via hand written note, left under my front door. I went on one date with him. And I didn't tell you this part...

The weekend following our date, this Tall Indian Guy (as he refers to himself) texted to see if I would like some wine at his apartment. I know that this is code for something else entirely. While I may be interested in wine, that is where my interest stops with this stalker. So I declined in a clear "No thanks, have a nice weekend" text back.

Well I saw him again yesterday! He was waiting for the elevator when I returned from my run. I was glistening (that's lady-talk for super sweaty). Tall Indian Guy was friendly and polite. He gave me a side-hug even though I was dripping of sweat sparkle. We small talked until the elevator got me to my blessed floor.

If I were to be completely honest with you, which I always am, I'd have to say that: I love first run-ins. I dread them so, but things aren't usually as awkward as I expect. So I prefer to get it over with as soon as possible. I've even had 2 near run-ins with the smelly beard man. I saw him once in Penn Station and once in the subway as he pretended not to notice me. I'm such a big deal that I'm hard to miss, what with all the papa-razzi following and all. Obvi.

Have you had any uber-awkward run-ins? Do tell.

Friday, October 29, 2010


I admit that my costume ideas are a little bit lamespice this year. It's all an attempt at being green. Reduce Reuse Recycle = my Halloween motto.

Idea 1- Redo the Facebook costume from 2 years ago.
here we are "updating my profile"

Idea 2- Steal slash recycle my friends' costume idea from 2 years ago and dress as a NYC tourist.
I heart NY t-shirt is a must, plus fanny pack and map. Add sneakers to complete the look.
If I can get some others to join me, we can be a tour group complete with a big red umbrella.

Idea 3- Get inspired by you for a new plan.
I have no picture for this idea. So probs it won't be happening. That's how I roll. Also it's not green to do something new. Everybody knows that.

As evidenced by last year's Halloween posting, I'm kind of a lazy costumer. This is supposed to be a kiddie holiday anyway, right?

Not in NY. Here it is all about the grown-ups getting into some late night tricks and treats.

Do adults dress up where you're from or do you let the kids have all the fun? Do you have a go-to costume?

Tuesday, October 26, 2010


This has absolutely nothing to do with anything.
But I saw it and I thought of you. And that is meaningful, right? - If you dress like Snooki for Halloween, I'm going to punch you in the face
I may now have my costume idea. It would be the scariest costume I've worn in years. Maybe ever. Spooky Snooki has quite a ring to it.
Thoughts on this brilliance?

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Safety 1st

Crossing the street can be a very dangerous thing to do.

During my morning commute last week, I witnessed a man walking across the street while a turning SUV sped up as if to hit the pedestrian. It was a very near miss, and the pedestrian was angry. I was angry too. This is New York and there are pedestrians everywhere, so drivers need to pay attention lest they hit one. And on the Upper Eastside, I do not tolerate this sort of behavior. Obvi.

Generally though, when a near-miss happens, Mr. Driver realizes that he nearly killed someone and takes a second to apologize or look embarrassed, or at least has the decency to drive off quickly.

Not this time.

This time, Mr. Driver slowed down to yell at the pedestrian! And as the shocked witness, I can tell you that it was clearly the driver's fault in this instance.
This time, Mr. Driver even pulled over and parked. He was clearly looking for a fight but the victim of his recklessness had already escaped, thank God. Fighting on the UES is base and therefore not tolerated. Unless previously contracted and agreed upon by yours truly, or outside of a bar on 2nd Avenue past 11pm.
As the solid citizen that I am, I noted this A$$hole's license plate so that he can be banned from further UES maniacal antics and banished to Midtown where he belongs. Get this... it was a vanity plate!

It read:

I die.
This is so perfect.
And now you know, if someone has a NY plate that says RUDE1, you should egg his black SUV whilst keeping in mind that Mr. Driver is looking for fights and will most likely try to kill you.

Tuesday, October 19, 2010


I stumbled upon this photo in my incredible phone (pun intended- it is a Droid Incredible). I snapped it when in NJ with my Mom and sister over Labor Day weekend.
What a warm memory of pretty coffee in a quaint cafe with loving ladies. Simple and simply delightful.

And in 2 weeks I'll be flying to Mexico with these wonder women to sip some more cafe and maybe even a tequila sunrise tambien. I feel carefree just thinking about it, like anything could happen.

What are you looking forward to? Also, I just realized that my last post is about "living in the present" and already my mind is in the future. See how that happens?

Sunday, October 17, 2010


I've never been a huge country music fan. Admittedly, I get into the poppy sounding stuff. But, for the most part I have no clue what's out there in country-music-ville.

Did you know that Darius Rucker has a new album? Never thinking it was a country sound, I've loved Hootie and the Blowfish for always and forever. Even won tickets from a radio contest to see them in a private(ish) concert a few years ago.

Anywho, I downloaded Darius' new song "This" today and listened to it multiple times.... I'm not saying it is the best song ever or anything, but it spoke to me. And that's what counts.

It has such a message. It hit me and I got the magnitude like woah. Moral of the story: the lyrics are all about how whatever went right in life or wrong in life is what led to this point. I like that.

I'm a huge opponent of the phrase "everything happens for a reason". It is a statement that drives me cra-zy. B-A-N-A-N-A-S. Someday I'll tell you all about it. And I apologize ahead of time for that day. :)

This song, however, is what I think people are trying to say with "everything happens for a reason". That when life happens and things go wrong and big huge moments don't go as planned, hoped, and longed for, we have an opportunity. To grow. To change. To learn and move and pick ourselves up to face another day. And when we do, our lives take a new direction for better or worse. And those new directions lead to this. The now.

I was upset recently because I'd really like to be in a relationship and it just doesn't seem to be working out, nor does it ever work out as planned in my very smart brain. I get so sick of first dates: that nervous uncomfortable feeling, the way I make every goodbye awkward, and how I generally turn out to not like the guy anyway!

I confess that I had a pity-party where I mourned the past and doomed the future. I spilled my guts and my tears with my roomies who helped baby-step me back to reality of life and love, and the life I love.
[aside: maybe I took too many baby-steps, because today I can think of a zillion reasons why I'm happy to be single and not in a relationship. Happy to be in the here and now with me, myself, and I.]

Living in the present moment is practically impossible. I've attempted to do it all my life and still can't seem to stay in today for more than an instant. When I do though, I can be nothing but grateful.

Grateful for my mother.
Grateful for my family and my friends. Who they are and who they have helped me to be.
Grateful for my health and my life.
Grateful for getting past all those terrible days and for the path I took to pass each one by. Whether it be a family emergency, a break-up, a bad haircut, or a pity-party. I'm glad I'm in today rather than those days!

And I know those days will come again. Suffering comes to all.
But for right now I'm grateful.

Pieces of lyrics I liked from "This":
"Maybe it didn't turn out like I planned
Maybe that's why I'm such a lucky man
All the doors that I had to close,

All the things I knew but I didn't know
Thank God for all I missed
Cause it led me here to this"

Monday, October 11, 2010

Monday Subway Story

I suppose a lot of you fellow commuters have the day off for Columbus Day. However, I (like Christopher Columbus) came into work today. And the strangest thing happened on the subway. Eerie, really.

Instead of yearning for my bed and wallowing in self-pity slash jealousy on this national holiday, I'm rejoicing in the fact that NO ONE TOUCHED ME on the subway! I mean, there was no butt on butt action, no one's arm against my arm or purse strategically resting on my leg. You could say it was a miracle. You could definitely say that.
[An empty subway car is Urban Legend. This is an optical illusion created for the purposes of exaggeration only. Do not be disturbed. A middle-aged drunk man in a suit is no doubt sleeping under one of the seats.]

Granted, there were enough laborers en route to fill the seats and leave standing-room-only, but that is A-ok with this Uptown Girl. Namely because if I sit for too long during Morning-Commute-StageII of The Sleep Cycle, I'll surely seep back into REM.
It's science. Simple science.

With that in mind, please enjoy this holiday. I thank you for the breathing room this morning. It was special.

Friday, October 8, 2010

photo documentation

Here we have photographic evidence of the events described in the post below. Next time you should come join us in some fabulously fun flirty escapades...

(aside: rbar is not a fave spot of this Uptown Girl. Great tunes, but there are poles. Poles! How tacky.)

Atlantic Grill
good friends + good food = great times

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

brush that dirt off my shoulder

I may have told you this before... I'm kind of a big deal you know. Lately I've been busy busy busy with fun, active, and glamorous life pursuits.

More active than ever before in my life:

- hot yoga classes -
- kickball team -
- rollerblading -
- dating -
- running -
- indoor soccer team -

And, of course, dancing. No, not dance classes. Ok I did rock 1 hot Zumba class and will return when my schedule allows. My dance has been in posh bars with my best besties. Rocking out to all sorts of tunes. Last weekend I think I heard Ace of Base played 3-4 times between RBar and Lit Lounge. If you ever go to Lit Lounge, please be advised that they have a great DJ yet hot as Hades temperatures. And I'm not saying hot people. I'm saying sweaty people. Picture that.

All this action has been exhausting. And rewarding. It may be all the endorphins typing, but I'm happier and more at peace than I was in my former sedentary days. Don't worry, I still find the time to sit on the couch and watch DVR'd tv for hours and for going out to eat. Often.

In the glamour department: I ate delish shellfish at Atlantic Grill on Monday night with my roomies and Jenny May of Swede Records (fellow bridesmaid in Liza's upcoming wedding). She was here for the weekend and if I get my way, Jenny and her Swede will be moving to the Upper Eastside come springtime.
Aside: do you know that Jenny has 978 followers. Un-be-liev-a-ble.

Does anyone have a picture of this blogathering?

What have you been up to blogland? I'm so behind at my blog reading!

Monday, October 4, 2010

subway horror story

I stepped onto the subway this morning to a horrifying (yet not uncommon) sight. Picture this. A teenage boy and girl in an intimate embrace. Holding onto each other rather than the bar. And then they made out. Like teenagers in a dark movie theater. Except they were on the train with a myriad of commuters and an Uptown Girl. Hi.

This behavior is not ok.

It is a Monday morning. Were you aware?
I now realize why, when I was in high school, adults on the train hated my friends and me(!). At the time I thought "they" were ageist freaks! Now I know that it is the other way around: teenagers are little psychopaths trying to ruin my Monday. Technically I already knew this tried and true fact, but it seems like fresh information right now.

I will not let this ruin my day. I will move on and forget the inappropriate PDA that started my work-week. I will get a lot of work done. I will persevere. I will pledge to end the week with some PDA of my own.

Why should the teens get to have all the fun?

Friday, October 1, 2010

Look Out Ladies

There's nothing like the Onion News to kick off this lovely Friday. And by lovely I mean there is a full-blown monsoon outside. Sam Champion, please remedy this and show us some sunshine this weekend.

Obama Releases 500,000 Men From U.S. Strategic Bachelor Reserve

I think I speak for all the singles ladies (move over Beyonce) when I say that this report is a dream come true. Who knew Obama was so thoughtful!?

Thursday, September 30, 2010

These boots were made for walking

I recently purchased these fantastigorical new boots from Steve Madden.
For $100.
I'm telling you this because fellow blogger-to-the-stars, Daily Ann-tidote, posted this morning about an adorable Anthropologie inspired Look For Less.
So I thought I'd share. Remember: sharing is caring.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010


Dearest Blogland,

I just got home from drinks with my admirer (one of many, obvi).

Just checking in to let you know that I'm alive and well. I had a nice time chilling with my 6'3" date, albeit, there were no sparks. Yes, I asked his height.

Also no kidnapping or murder to report. This admirer is seemingly not a stalker, nor is he dangerous yet.

Nite nite Sprite. Sweet dreams.

Uptown Girl

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Train Traffic Ahead

Sitting on an Amtrak train (as I head home from a few days away from my Upper Eastside pied-et-teir), I am doing a lot of thinking. More thinking than sleeping unfortunately.

Thinking: My train was delayed and this is unacceptable.

Thinking: I hope I can make it back to NYC without using the train restroom a second time. If not, I may cry.

Thinking: I hope I made the right move in calling the Tall Indian Guy and agreeing to a coffee date.
As Katy pointed out in her comment, I've now confirmed my address to a possible serial killer. Prepare for the worst, hope for the best, right?

Thinking: Some dude walking thru the train has his hat on sideways. He looks like he walked into a wall. No offense to any of you who can't place a hat on straight...

Thinking: I have a first date tonight - no one you know, and he has never left any notes to tip me off to creepsterville.
What will I wear? I'm so lucky to have Liza, my very own Upper Eastside wardrobe consultant. Live-in.

Thinking: Lovey - Bestie and Roomie - went apple picking while I was out of town. I love apples! I'm so looking forward to going home to my roommates, apples, dvr, and my bed... oh how I've missed the amenities of the UES while at my work conference.

Thinking: I'm so glad I extended my trip to spend some quality time with the fam. I got to see my brother and sister-in-law in Virginia, and the 4 cutest kids in the world. I gave my nephew a free hotel pen and he said, "oh my goodness, this is my first very own pen Aunt UG!" I'm pretty sure he will remember that moment for years to come... Who can forget their first very own pen?

And now my mind is empty. I can now think only of the train bathroom. With dread. Tears in my eyes and dread in my heart.
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Wednesday, September 22, 2010

not so secret admirer

Have you ever had a secret admirer? Let me tell you what it's like.
Except for the part that my secret admirer is not a secret. But oh well, it's kind of like the same thing.

When I woke up this morning, on my day off, there was an envelope stuck under the front door. Inside was a folded up note that reads:

Subj: "Unorthodox"

To: The Brunette, who has a roundish cute face, who I think lives here

From: Tall Indian guy who has seen you in the building and in the elevator occasionally. Unfortunately, you're never alone - so I couldn't introduce myself.

If you'd like to grab coffee or a drink sometime - please call or text.

-Tall Indian guy (212-Admirer)
[Name and phone number changed to protect my admirer]

And there you have it folks.

Confusingly enough, there are two brunettes in my apartment. I mean, Liza is a Blondie, so we can safely rule her out (barring red-green color blindness). But, hi, Lovey is a "brunette who has a roundish cute face". Super cute in fact.

However, Lovey has no frame of reference for a "Tall Indian guy" in the building. And I think I know exactly who it is. I often see a "Tall Indian guy" in the elevator. And he's pretty good looking.

My roomies thought this was a very romantic gesture, while my immediate reaction is stalker. A romantic stalker, if you will. How does he know where I live? Did he follow me? Did he leave the same note under every door in the hallway?

I looked through the peep-hole and there was no stalker standing by, and this is just one note. So instead of jumping to extremes, I'm going to officially dub this "Tall Indian guy" an admirer rather than jump to stalker. For now.

Now then. What is your initial reaction? I'm def gonna ask my guy-friends for their reactions. Future-Brother-in-Law, what do you think? Tell me everything.

I'm considering calling the number and going for coffee. What would you do? Any advice for this Uptown Girl?

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

How did this happen??

I'll be turning 30 soon. In 3 months actually (allegedly).
I've been dreading this for so many many years and yet it feels as though something has crept up on me overnight.

Bizarro Station.

The fact is: I think I'm ready. Ready to take on the world. That's what 30 year olds do right?

Monday, September 13, 2010

Blading Beauty

This is what I did on Saturday...
Do I resemble Rollerblading Barbie?
Or does she resemble me?

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

Gotta go to Mo's

Here I am.
Yes, contrary to popular belief, I am still alive and kicking.
Busy, suffering from writer's block, not reading any blogs, distracted, distract-able, and kicking.

I may or may not have neglected to write because I know a certain someone sometimes reads my blog. And I started feeling a bit self-conscious about sharing my innermost thoughts and feelings over the internet when I knew he might read it. Is that cryptic enough?

Good. Moving on.

The most interesting news I have to report is this: I bought some rollerblades today! And wrist/elbow/knee pads. At Modell's. Gotta go to Mo's.
I also got some sweet tips from the adorable sales-dude. I'm hoping to avoid serious injury via the sales-dude tips, wrist pads, and blading on flat ground for the time being. We'll see.

Maybe next I'll join roller-derby. Most def. Do I have to wear a helmet for that?

Friday, August 13, 2010


Work has been busy and consuming this week. And so has my social calendar.
Please forgive me for my unscheduled absence in the world wide web. I think of you often and have a couple posts rolling around in my head. But no time to write them! - Just checking you off my list of people to get back to

I'm heading out to see an outdoor screening of Ghostbusters tonight. I'm sure this excursion will add itself to my list of ideas to post about. I hope it proves to be as amazing and life-like as it was in my childhood. Bill Murray was cute then, right? I don't recall.

I should end this by saying "I ain't afraid of no ghost". But that would be a lie. I'm afraid of ghosts and serial killers. And Monday mornings. And Brooklyn.

Here I come weekend!

Friday, August 6, 2010

Last night a DJ saved my life

You know how I love me some sweet tunes? Who doesn't. Come on. I've posted in the past about how a certain song can bring me back to a feeling, a moment, a bremory, and an era.

Life changes so much and yet things stay so much the same. I'm in a new genre today. Spanish Rock. Mainly: Mana and Juanes. My coworker is ready to kill me for playing it non-stop. But, that's nothing new. Wink to the wink wink.

In this place in my life, the genre is new bc I never hear it anymore, but really it played a large role in my relationship with my Latin eX-husband. I've been thinking about and talking about said eX so much lately that it is making me wonder. Why?

As Lovey (my bestie who happens to be a therapist to the stars) never fails to remind me, it is a good thing to feel my feelings and think about whatever is surfacing rather than distract myself and stuff my feelings. As is my inclination. I find that she is right about most things and this is no exception. Therefore, I'm rocking out in Spanish today in hopes that I can get these memories to the surface and that they will then dissipate.
These days my feelings about my eX are way chilled out compared to how intense they used to be. I no longer feel homicidal and maniacal, and I can see my part in the mess formerly known as us.

And my Catholic annulment came thru. 100 percenta!

I'm happy in my life and relieved to have that chapter closed. Officially closed. I love my roomies and living situation and I continue to be relieved not to live with the eX - but after a lot of time and distance.... I ever so humbly confess that I wouldn't want to live with myself in that relationship either. We were a toxic combo and my worstest possible qualities were on fire. Not a pretty place for an Uptown Girl to be.

That said, I'm listening to Bendita Tu Luz and offering a prayer for the eX. That he may come to a place of peace and joy, self-awareness, and love.

My prayers for him used to be quite different. So, in light of that, I also have a prayer of thanksgiving for my own growth and insight into the past (and for the annulment!). I know it will help me with my present and my future.

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

cloud 9

Just now I was in old the elevator with an old man. He turned to me and said, "what weighs more, you or your purse?"
I took it as a compliment. My purse isn't even all that heavy today. What a charmer.

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Saturday, July 31, 2010

I'm IT

I've been tagged by one of the most fabulous bloggers, Ann from Daily Ann-tidote. Remember when we met IRL? How sacot are we?

Well, Ann was tagged to answer some Qs and then she tagged yours truly. I'm copy/pasting her post so I can be as lazy as possible about this. Don't worry, I'll be sure to change the answers. Otherwise I could be arrested for plagiarism or something.

1) What's a perfect styling for you?
I have no idea. I do love wearing classics and anything reminiscent of Jackie O, so lets go with that.

2) For what do you spend most of your money?
Going out to eat. In fact I have another afternoon food-tour planned today. Planned to lighten my wallet I suppose.

3) What's your favorite song at this moment?
Ours by The Bravery... and countless others.

4) Which excellences do you think you have?
I don't understand this question. I'm excellent all around Don't you think? I know!

5) And What are your failings?
Failings? Really? I'm an Uptown Girl. If I had to choose something I'd say procrastination. Right now I'm supposed to be cleaning my apartment.

And now I tag these bloggers:
Liza (or any contributor) at Own It... duh

Sunday, July 25, 2010

Homeward Bound

I'm sitting at the airport waiting to board my flight to NY. And I'm sad.
By the end of a trip I'm usually ready to get home and get back to my peeps and my life. As much as I do def miss my bed and my besties back in the concrete jungle that I lovingly call home... I also already miss my besties that I just hugged, kissed, and honked goodbye.
And my lakehouse and Lake Ponchartrain. And my two two-year old boyfriends.

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Saturday, July 24, 2010

My boyfriend...

He's a little south of my age range, but maybe that's why our relationship works so well? Also he gives great hugs.

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Crawfish Time

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Thursday, July 22, 2010

sunset on the front porch

can you say yummy?
got 2 love it.

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on stilts

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tech difficulty

bleh. I can't even edit my posts remotely... at all.
Please try to overlook and ignore my typos in vacay posts here on out.

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and so it begins...

I just typed up a long elaborate post about the start of my Louisiana vacay with my college girls.
I'm way too frustrated with Blogger-Droid to type the whole priceless post.

Try to be satisfied with this photo and my vacay stats.

Vacay Stats:
11 college girlfriends.
4 of their husbands (one of whom us also a college friend is mine).
4 cabins which turned out to be posh beach houses that sit ON the water.
14 children under 4 years old.

Endless running, screaming, laughing, eating, and fun.

Happy Vacay Blogland! ttfn mi amor!

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Tuesday, July 13, 2010


If the virtual world of social media has taught me anything of use (it hasn't), it is that people want a status update now and again. This isn't always the case, but people like to think that other people care about the update. And, of course, people don't always care. But you care about my status updates and that's what matters.

The update is that I'm on a dating hiatus. Partly by choice and partly by accepting the situation for what it is. Yes, I already updated this status, I suppose, when I told you I ended my online dating career. I was utterly fed up with online dating and frustrated by my own obsession with it. I mean... come on. Who wants to hear all that "why didn't he call?" and "maybe he'll call tonight" and "oh what a d-bag" all the time, over and over in your own head? Not me. It was at the point where I was annoying myself and, well, it was pretty annoying. Believe me.

And now, on my hiatus, I have a clearer head and a peaceful heart. I'm much happier with my singleness. Read: I'm content. It means that I'm on a break from stressing out about what is. This by no means means that I'm not open to dating. Feel free to send your brother, cousin, son, guy-friend, or co-worker my way. Just please only send grown-ups. Literally and figuratively.

My mancation* is all that it's cracked up to be. I know all the answers to all the silly little "He's Just Not That Into You" questions. The answer is.... NO. No he's no calling tonight. Read: I don't need to check my phone a zillion times and get disappointed a zillion times. It's freeing, chillaxing, and calmer.

My roommates Some might compare me to Ginnifer Goodwin's role in the "He's Just Not That Into You" movie. Full of hope and pouring oodles of effort into meeting someone who fills her heart with joy. Only to be consistently crushed. [aside: this applies in the Leading Up To A Relationship stage of dating. To reveal my In A Relationship behavior and personality, please see the long ridiculous and embarassing post that i haven't yet written.]

Like this character, I'm repeating a mantra. "I'm not the exception, I'm the rule". As you would imagine, this mantra is quite convoluted for an Uptown Girl to wrap her brain around.
I'm so used to being a special, unique, and exceptional Uptown Girl, that it is a lot of work to convince me that "I'm the rule". And that "Men Love Bitches". That's another one I need to work on... being more of a bi-otch to the men I date.

Do you see?? See what happens? Not 2 paragraphs ago, I was telling you how calm I am. And a moment later I'm already deciding what I need to work on and tell myself and how to behave so these men (who, I can readily admit, are the biggest idiots and douches out there) will like me! This is problem. I don't want to have to play some stupid manipulative game.

I need this mancation. A well deserved break from acting "approachable yet aloof". That's hard work. I want to just let my hair down. Or, more like, put it in a ponytail. I want to be myself and hang with the people who can see and love that self. And that is all.

For now.

*according to the world wide web, mancation is a vacay for men. according to me, it is a vacay from them.

Sunday, July 11, 2010

The Lady in Spain

Felicidades EspaƱa!

I adore Ingrid Michaelson. Spain winning La Copa del Mundo is as good an excuse as any to play this delightful song.

I can be
anything that I see
I can be anything that I
anything that I see...

I'm sure these lyrics are all the rage in Spain as they revel in their World Cup gana. No doubt.

Friday, July 9, 2010


In New York, we have multiple free newspapers. Every morning people hand out 2 of said freebies in the subway stations. Aggressively.

I stopped taking the papers because:
1- I'm on a crossword puzzle break.
2- There are sometimes offensive ads (like for that website that facilitates married people cheating... and it shall not be named on this blog) and there is no reason to get any crankier in the morning.
3- If I don't end up reading the paper I still have to carry it around.


At the first station, where I squeeze my body onto the subway, there is this dude that stands directly in my path, in front of the top of the stairs. He tries to hand the paper out and I say "no thanks" everyday and push past him.

When I arrive at my stop, after practicing my defensive line skills and making my way off the train, there is a man handing out the same paper and yelling, "free, free, free, free, free, free, free!".

Then again, "free, free, free, free, free, free, free!".

I keep walking.

Every morning this week, this overly-caffeinated newsie was yelling, "LeBron, LeBron, LeBron, LeBron, LeBron, LeBron, LeBron!".

And then again, "LeBron, LeBron, LeBron, LeBron, LeBron, LeBron, LeBron!".

There you have it people. I don't need to read the Metro or AM. I get my headlines yelled at me and drilled into my head. Reading becomes an unnecessary task. - I heard from a reliable source that you don't give a shit where LeBron ends up

*In reality I now read my news online on my INCREDIBLE new phone outfitted with the handy dandy world wide web wherever I go. Except in the subway. Drat.

Some real news: Manhattan is getting a Target.

Wednesday, July 7, 2010

anticipation kills

In two short weeks I'm leaving on a jet-plane on vacay! My college girlfriends and I have been planning a mini-reunion for over a year now. We're all heading down to a lake in Louisiana where we've rented out cabins.

Camping, if you will.

My version of camping includes beds, running water, a roof, electricity, loads of bug spray, and a kitchen. So Parent Trap-esque. Obvi. I am interested in attempting that other kind of camping I've heard so much about. Someday.
The point is, I'm uber excited to see so many besties that I haven't seen in ages & years. You know the kind of friends that last a lifetime? When you see each other it's like no time has passed and you can pick up right where you left off? Yeah, that's what it's like when I see these girls. We all lead busy lives in various cities and states and we don't talk as often as we used to. I haven't even met most of the kids that will be there and barely know the husbands. We keep in touch via Facebook photos, mass emails, and an occasional phone call or text. I know if I update my profile pic, I'll get comments from my girls. And when one of them gets a haircut with bangs... I'm all over that.
I really can't wait for my Louisiana vacay - in the sweltering heat, with insects galore, and oil already in our lake - because it's basically bound to be sensational.

Monday, July 5, 2010

For Vienna

As much as I loved to hate Vienna (of the Bachelor for those of you who live in, on, or under a rock) a few months ago... I now feel surprisingly empathetic towards her. Consider this heart warmed.
In light of that fuzzy fact, I would like to share my most fave bad-break-up song ever. EVER. It is my freedom song and I'm lending it to Vienna for now.

Friday, July 2, 2010

Beach bum

This weekend I'll be going from here

to here

be jealous.

[I know what you're thinking. And, yes, that is the Jersey Shore sans Snooki. It's better and cleaner that way.]

Wednesday, June 30, 2010

book worming

I'm part of a pretty sensational book club comprised of 4 close friends and yours truly.

Right now we are finishing up the best book I've read in the last couple years: "East of Eden" by Steinbeck.
What genius. I've laughed, I've cried, and I've thought about lots of deep stuff. Sorta philosophical if you will.

Oh you will? Great.

As we are beginning the end (last 100 pages coming right up), The Club is discussing what to read next. Maybe something we can really sink our teeth into. Wow, hunger pang.

We're thinking historical fiction. What is your fave historical fiction? Do share. And, if you're very lucky, I might just suggest your book to The Ladies of the Club ("The Ladies of the Club" is the title of a book I couldn't get thru. Bleh book. Great title. Good advice= don't judge a book by it's cover. Yeah. I bet you've never heard that before, have you?).

Historical Fiction I've read and loved:

The Josephine Bonaparte Collection by Sandra Gulland

The Other Boleyn Girl by Philippa Gregory

Other Books That I Can't Think of Now by Early Onset Alzheimer's

Your faves please?

Friday, June 25, 2010

Because it's Friday - If you want your workplace grievances taken seriously, don't air them in a magazine with Lady Gaga on the cover
Because it's Friday, I can't remember if i have any workplace grievances this week. All I know is that I'm utterly confused about the whole McCrystal debacle.

I mean.... everytime I watch or read news this week, I learn something new or contradictory to the last time I tuned in.

What boggles my mind is #1- the game of Boggle, and #2- that in this day and age, someone would be so dumb as to somehow dis their boss publicly. Don't you know that you don't do that on Facebook, loudspeaker, or magazine article?
[Aside: please don't be offended Blogland. By "you" here, I don't actually mean you. I mean Generals. I think I can safely assume that Generals in general don't read my blog as I never refer to war, weapons, or ammunition. Sometimes hot men in uniform, but even that is rare. Note to self....]

If you don't have something nice to say, come sit next to me.

In writing, workplace slander should only occur on an anonymous blog. Not even in email. Now, if you ask me if I've ever complained about my boss in writing, well, I'd have to plead the Fifth... but I do know it's a bad idea. Obvi. Plus, my boss isn't the President of the U S of A. Or even the boss of the company. Don't tell him I said that though.

You're welcome for all this etiquette advice.
Always remember, in the words of a very wise woman with a scarily auto-tuned voice:
Money can't buy you class. Elegance is learned, my friends.

Monday, June 21, 2010


Does anyone have the Droid Incredible?
I just got it a couple days ago and I'm still playing slash figuring it all out slash developing an addiction.

As you can see, I can post from anywhere now. But I don't know if there is an app that will let me read blogs easily?? Your blog to be exact.
I am so way behind in my blog reading these days. I could stalk you better if there were an app for that.

Maybe it is listed under S for "Stalker" rather than B for "Blogger".

I'll find out. Oh I will.

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the tally

Thank you for voting on the poll. Clearly you all (but one) think I should continue the online dating.

I'm a big rebel though (ask my mom). I ended my subscription. I just can't take it anymore.

For now, I'll try to keep seeing the men I met online and meet the rest organically.
In real life.
The old fashioned way: drunk at a bar with a low cut top.
Negative. That was a lie. Trashy is not so much my style. I prefer to be a classy lady and bring all the boys to the yard in more subtle ways. Using telepathy and subliminal messaging. And batting my eyes like Betty Boop. Now she had it going on.

Somehow my skills don't yield a high return (although I'm having luck with 30 Rock men), but I will continue to practice and bring you some stories.

For now, TV Man is keeping me distracted. I'll report back with more deets a-s-a-p. Maybe later tonite.

Sunday, June 20, 2010

mtg all of 30 rock

yeah. I am meeting the cast of 30 Rock... one comedian at a time.
Maybe next will be that cute new guy.
Here's hoping!

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Tuesday, June 8, 2010

my own hue

Life is a train of moods like a string of beads;
and as we pass through them they prove to be many colored lenses,
which paint the world their own hue,
and each shows us only what lies in its own focus.

-Ralph Waldo Emerson

I read this quote on my way to work this morning on the subway. I guess it's true what they say: you can find inspiration anywhere. It inspired me. Inspired me to blog! I've been so busy at work lately that I haven't taken the time to post. And I haven't felt that nagging feeling that says, "Uptown Girl, the world needs to hear about ____ topic! Write about this:____!" AKA, no real inspiration.

But, please reread that quote. For me, it is so true. Truth. Word. It speaks to me and it says: choose your attitude because your attitude changes everything. When I'm in a bad mood, everything seems bleak. But when I even try a little bit to break out of that mood, well the sun begins to shine in my mind. Lately I've been breaking out of the yucky mood when it arises by getting grateful. Putting things in perspective.

My perspective is this:

I have a job, friends who I love, family who I love, a great apartment, and my finances are looking up. I'm healthy and able to be active. I have a 2nd date with TV man on Saturday. And my sister lets me borrow her great accessories and wardrobe whenever I want.

Life is good. My problems are luxury problems (at least right now). Problems do exist and I by no means think that it's good to walk through life with rose colored glasses all the time... that would be tacky. However, I should be rejoicing rather than complaining about the weather or my hair or boys, for example. But when I let myself sink into that yucky mood, I feel hopeless about my bangs and my good job and men. I let myself forget. I start to see through a blue lens.
Perspective is everything.

I have one patient who is a girl my age, wheelchair bound, has difficulty speaking (although she does speak) and moving, and yet every single time I see her she has a huge smile and gives me a hug. Her hugs are giving hugs. They are full of warmth and love and they seem to be hugs that she knows people need. She never says this, but I feel as though when she opens her arms for a hug it is like "here, you need a hug". Anywho. She gives me perspective. Life is what you make of it.
Today I got some incredible news and my mood is lifted. And I look good today (if I do say so myself). My hair is behaving. There is low humidity. I'm eating surf&turf for dinner tonight. For free. What could be better? My lens is a bright sunny yellow.

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Da Do Run Run Run Da Do Run Run

So the Friday night date re-cap is a little overdue. Please excuse me, I know you've been waiting anxiously.

I will refer to this guy as TV man. You guessed it. He works in television. Behind the scenes, although he is cute enough to be on camera.
This is a first date story of SUCCESS! TV Man = a keeper! At least until after date #2 when I will again re-evaluate. Statistically, let's just say his chances don't look so good. It's not my decision, it's just math.

Ok. Yes. It is my decision. And I'm attempting to remain in a certain state of mind. The state of pleasantly surprised.

It works like this:

Date #1 went smoothly. How do I feel? Pleasantly surprised.
TV Man texted me something cute the next day. How do I feel? Pleasantly surprised that he followed up.
Tuesday night, TV Man called and asked me for Date #2 (and has a whole elaborate plan in mind). How do I feel? Pleasantly surprised.

My BFF Lovey taught me this technique. My usual state of mind with dating is more extreme. Either the state of high expectations OR the state of expecting disaster, doom & gloom, and calamity. This technique is your basic no expectations approach. Seems to be working for me.

TV Man travels a lot, so coordinating Date #2 is tricky and still up in the air. Afterall, I'm an Uptown Girl and my schedule (to be pronounced like "shed"- the fancy way) is quite busy. Between my elite array of activities and TV Man's globe-trotting lifestyle, we may lose some momentum, or we may not. Time will tell.
To be completely honest, as always, I don't think I would mind dating someone who travels often. I like my Independence and my girltime and, unless I'm super into a guy, I don't want to see him everyday anyways. That said, I'm looking to get super into a guy. Soooooo in that case maybe I would actually want him around? How is this supposed to work?

Enough rambling for one lunch break. I will keep you abreast of the situation. Because I know you care. Deeply.

Thursday, May 27, 2010


I have another first date tomorrow night. It's getting to be ridiculous already. My roommates know exactly what I'll say when I get home and they ask about the date.

Me: "It was ok. He was really nice, but I don't really like him like that". Every. single. time.

In the last 5 months, I've gone out with 7 guys from online, 2 guys from real life. 13 dates total.

I sort of liked one guy a little bit (the pilot), and he texted but never called. Rude. I totally liked another guy after only 2 dates and then he dropped off of planet Earth. You do the math. That leaves 7 dudes that I didn't like for one reason or another.

Statistically speaking, I will have a lovely evening eating seafood with my date tomorrow, but will not want to go out with the man again. That is: 85% probability with a mean of 3.

I made that up but I'm sure it is leftover knowledge from my college statistics course. 50% sure.

Anywhooooo this leads me to my newest poll. Yay blog!
Please see the top right-hand internet banner thing and VOTE about my online dating future. My future is in your hands and your mouse. Choose wisely.

Monday, May 24, 2010


The Bachelorette starts tonight...

To be completely honest, I have mixed feelings about Ali.
25 of America's hottest bachelors in one tv show? Doing idiotic over-the-top stuff to win 1 girl? Interviews with studs saying they are in love with a total stranger?

Yeah. I wouldn't miss it.

Thursday, May 20, 2010

Shake it like a polaroid picture

I went to a dance class last night at the gym. Latin dance to be exact.
I Cha-cha-cha'd, I Salsa'd, I Samba'd. I don't know how to signify the past tense of these dances. Clearly. That's why I put the 'd.

Anywho back to the Samba. I didn't really get that one and sort of just jumped around. Like skipping while moving my hips. Picture that.

I know, right? Beautiful.

I'm still sore. Yeah, as in: everytime I walk up or down stairs, or try to sit in a chair, or on a toilet (if this is tmi for you, then cover your eyes for the rest) my thighs burn and I have to grab hold of something or someone to keep me steady. I had the same feeling after I walked up 25 flights up stairs for exercise one rainy day a couple months ago.

If you want I can teach you how to Latin dance since you could say I'm sort of like an expert now. Sort of like that.

My inspiration for dance of all types is (of course) the great Napoleon. He knows how to shake his groove thing and move it move it. Uh huh. Aww yeah.

Enjoy this video. It will make your day. Obvi.

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

I pay attention to current events

Since everybody knows that sharing equals caring, I will happily share my knowledge via someecards.
I'd go to Times Square to prove I'm not afraid of terrorists if I didn't hate everything about Times Square

FYI, there's a romaine lettuce recall going on so make sure to keep eating the unhealthy crap you always do

I wonder if billionaire superhero Tony Stark could clean up an oil spill

I'm hoping that someecards will make a card about that dude hoping to get elected who mis-spoke about his service in/during Vietnam. I laugh everytime it comes on the news, so that'll be a good one. Fo shizzle.

Tuesday, May 18, 2010

I posted...

I posted over here at Own It today.
About this "real size" model.
Check it out.